The different stages of family mediation

For information on family mediation, please read the introduction to family mediation page

I will start by sending you a preliminary information form as well as an agreement to mediate

Initial meeting /MIAM

Before starting joint mediation sessions, each person has a one-to-one meeting with me. This is called a MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting) or an intake session

It’s a chance for you to ask questions, share what’s brought you here, and decide whether mediation feels right.

What We will Cover :

Your situation: What’s going on, what matters to you, and what you'd like to resolve?

How you’re communicating: With each other and (if relevant) with your children?
How mediation works: I’ll explain the process, what to expect, and what mediation can and can’t help with.
Safety and suitability: I’ll check there are no issues (like domestic abuse or coercion) that would make mediation unsafe or inappropriate.

What Happens Next?

If mediation is suitable and both of you want to go ahead, we’ll arrange the first joint session. If not, I can help you think through other options.

First joint mediation session

It is where we begin the actual conversation.

What to Expect? What will we Cover?

Setting the Scene : I will recap how mediation works and make sure you both feel clear and comfortable about the process.
Creating the Agenda : We will make a list of the issues you want to work through — such as: Child arrangements Money or property Support payments Communication. If children are involved, we often start there.
Exploring the First Topic : We will begin with one issue. You will each have space to share your views, listen to each other, and start thinking about options. I’ll help keep things focused and balanced.
You Might Need to Bring : If we are working on finances, I will explain what documents you’ll need to prepare ( Form E— things like income details, property values, or pensions —) for future sessions.

How many sessions do we need and how long do they last?

Most people need between 2 and 5 sessions, each lasting around 90 minutes. The exact number depends on:

If children are involved

Sorting out parenting time, holidays, and decisions about school can often be done in 2 to 3 sessions, especially if both parents want to move things forward.

If finances or property are involved

Financial matters usually take longer — expect 3 to 5 sessions to gather the right documents, understand each other’s positions, and work towards fair solutions.

If everything needs sorting (children and finances)

You may need a few more sessions to cover both areas thoroughly, often spaced out to allow for preparation between meetings.

Good to Know

You stay in control of how many sessions you have —

it’s not a fixed programme.

Some couples resolve things quickly; others need more time to explore options.
Mediation moves at your pace, not a court timetable.

We have come to an agreement during mediation, what now?

The next step is to put it into writing.

Written Summary

I will draft a summary of your agreement — sometimes called a Memorandum of Understanding. This is a clear, neutral record of what you’ve both agreed. If we have been discussing finances, I may also prepare an Open Financial Statement, which lays out your financial information.

Making It Legally Binding (Optional but Often Recommended)

Mediation agreements are not automatically legally binding — but many people choose to formalize them. There are two common options:

For child arrangements: You can keep it informal, or apply to court for a Child Arrangements Order to make the agreement legally enforceable.

For finances: You will usually take the agreement to a solicitor, who can help you turn it into a Consent Order. This is submitted to the court and, once approved by a judge, becomes legally binding.

In France : it is similar

Protocole d’accord

I will prepare a written summary of your agreement — often called a protocole d’accord in French. It’s a clear, neutral document that outlines the points you have agreed upon.

Agreements reached in mediation are not automatically legally binding. But you can choose to formalize them by applying to the Courts (JAF) with the assistance of a French Family lawyer (avocat)